Ragman has been MIA for 3 months..
Where’s the Ragman?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do you want a simple answer to a complex question??
Can you handle the story of man obsessed with a codless piece of meat between the legs of a 1980’s David Bowie??!
Well can you?
Can you handle the story of a man that likes to do dick & nut tricks and has an unhealthy obsession with the ‘80’s?
Well I hope you can. Cause the Ragman has returned and Dottie is on a coke binge.
COUNT THE DAYS ON YOUR ADVENT CALENDER BECAUSE THE RAGMAN WILL BE BACK LIKE A FRESH CASE OF HERPES ON A MEXICAN HOOKER’S COOTER.
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The madness continues 12-20-06 w/
2 new never before heard episodes:
THE HOLIDAY SPECTACULAR:
Uncovered from the archives of The Ragman & Dottie Show:
THE HALLOWEEN EPISODE:
TRICK OR TREAT (1986) - starring Marc Price, Gene Simmons, & Ozzy Osbourne.
&
THE CHRISTMAS EPISODE:
SANTA CLAUS:THE MOVIE (1985)
starring Dudley Moore & John Lithgow
JOIN THE RAGMAN & DOTTIE NEXT WEEK!!!
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until then......
this is what happened to the ‘ragman’.....
"The month of October was quickly approaching and the Ragman was getting all his holiday supplies together (this includes the "booger sugar" or the "nose candy" as some say).
All the arrangements were being planned for a spectacular podcast of grand proportions..... Then Dottie had to fuck it up and get a new job at the Payless Shoe Store. Well hooking wasn’t paying the bills anymore.. Plastic shoes were.... This is where the Ragman’s troubles begin...
Ragman wasn’t aware of Dottie’s "career" change and showed up at the usual "Jack Shack" where Dottie was usually turning tricks for 80’s VHS tapes that were straight out of the cut-out bin from ‘The Home Video Library’.
This is where it gets sick...
Everyhing use to be "Juanderful", but it wasn’t anymore...
The ‘Jack Shack’ changed ownership and was now an exclusive gay club. The Ragman was not aware of this. He should of known something was up when he walked in and saw a man that looked like Steve Guttenberg giving a hot-lunch to a Burt Reynolds lookalike.
This was a bad scene and just before the Ragman had a chance to ask Steve why he was shitting on Burt Reynolds chest, the Ragman was knocked to the floor by a Rutger Hauer lookalike who then proceeded to give the Ragman a hummer (and not the vehicle).
After this little altercation Ragman planned to go into seclusion. Ragman first had to make a stop at his favorite dealers house to get the ‘medicine’. As Ragman was on the way to the dealer’s house he was kidnapped by a several low level drug dealrs and forced to become a drug mule for a well known Columbian drug cartel.
As a drug mule the Ragman had to swallow hundreds of condomns filled with heroin & coke a day. He also had to shove as many cocaine filled balloons in his rectum (which was usually a tight spot, but know was a lot looser after the altercation at the ‘jack shack’).
After two months of being a mule for the cartels 'The Ragman' had another incident.. A condomn full of heroin burst in the Ragman’s belly and he collapsed on a flight from Miami to Newark. The Ragman was taken to a hospital and then was enrolled in several rehab programs.
The story ends here.
As for Dottie she was fired from the Payless Shoe Store and now working at The Cracker Barrel.
The Ragman is out of rehab and back, so is Dottie......
